Ruby: Where did my hat go?
Adriana: Maybe the kangaroo took it and flushed it down the toilet.
20 minutes of hilarious talk about flushing things down the toilet, including mom.
At school, the snow banks on the side of the street are so high, that the only way to get in and out of the MiniV is to use the street side. Because of the two lanes of parked cars and the snow, there is only room for one lane of cars to go past. Being 7 months preggo, with the uterus of a elephant (thanks girls), trying to manage two 3-year olds dressed for the arctic, two bags filled with extra undies, pants, shoes, snow-pants, art projects and then the two bags of valentine candy is like watching a Benny Hill skit. Scooting along dirty cars, trying to keep both sugar-high girls close to me, shoving them and their gear into the van, getting one buckled them smothering her with my belly while trying to get into the van to get the other buckled, first one kicks me in the gut, second one cries cause she is in the wrong seat, I knee the first in the leg, she cries, both want more sugar, get a foot cramp due to position, cars and other moms going past seeing only my large ass in the door and hearing two screaming kids. I finally wiggle my way out, pop a sucker in both girls mouths, crank up music, get tires stuck in the snow bank, drop my phone under my seat. Then, they start the toilet talk. By the time I am a block and a half away, still sweating, we are all laughing and covered in chocolate.
We have to laugh, cause we would cry our eyes out if we didn't!
Turns out, it was the best car ride home ever.
Happy Valentines Day!